The decision to have a child is one of the most important in one's life, whether you are a woman or a man. When you are in a couple, the decision is no longer an individual, but a common one. However, this decision is not always unanimous. You may want a child, and your partner may not know or be against it.
How do you tell him and how do you convince him?
Choose the right time to open the topic! Such a discussion, quite delicate, should not take place under any conditions. Choose a time when your partner is relaxed and well-disposed. He never started the discussion when he is stressed, when he comes from work or is sleepy. You will most likely receive a big "NO" in response and will not be willing to communicate too much on the subject.
Talk to them first and foremost about how compatible you are and how much you love them!
First of all, spoil it with some declarations of love. It also emphasizes the fact that you are compatible, you go through such a beautiful period in which you love a lot and that it is very good to conceive a baby and to enjoy the pregnancy and the birth of the child. Make a small picture and tell him how you see him as a father and how beautiful he will be, that they are unique experiences and last but not least, he also plays the most important book: sex. After all, conceiving a baby is not so bad and requires some activity in bed! He has no idea how to displace his idea!
Be prepared with an arsenal of arguments and solutions!
If you have discussed this topic before, but each time you have come to the conclusion that "this is not the right time", but you still have the desire, it is time to take action. Think about what the arguments against this idea have been so far. There may be more, but choose the 3 most powerful and important ones. Probably these are finances, limited time or the fact that you do not have a home of your own yet.
Wait, meditate and find solutions to these problems. It does not mean you have to buy the house or break a bank, but you have to look for compromise solutions. For example, make a small plan to show them that you will have time for yourself and that he can make time for the "boyfriends" evenings if you leave the child once to his mother, once to yours and so on. Further. Think about how soon you could return to work after birth (to increase the family budget a little) and with whom you could leave the baby during this time.
Be prepared for a rejection!
It does not take you to talk to your partner being very sure that he will say "yes" ... at least not from the first, if he has not agreed so far or got out of mustaches. So, you could bring all kinds of arguments again and even if you are ready to counter them, it is possible that his "no" will demoralize you a bit and let your guard down.
Be in the positions and trained as a stubborn lawyer!
Use examples around you! Whether it is finances, housing or the fear of having a child, it is possible that for a long time there will be these shortcomings. Tell him that if you go after these things you are never quite ready to have a baby and take care of him or bear the expenses, at least not if you are part of a family with a decent living.
To be even more convincing give examples around you, of friends who have children and who are not in a great financial situation, but they are doing great and enjoying every moment of their wonderful child. The examples are quite convincing and follow the principle "if they can, why can't I?".
Touch the sensitive side of your future father!
Highlight all the benefits and good things as well as the courage to have a small and beautiful baby. Get used to everything that is most gentle and beautiful in having a baby - those little, cute fingers and little toes that are just waiting to run all over the house. Tell her how happy it is to be a parent and a blessing! Then talk to him about the emotional side using the name "daddy". It will raise awareness and leave a little guard down on the categorical refusal.
Have you talked to your partner about having a baby? What were his reactions? What advice do you offer to aspirants? We look forward to your comments in the comments section below!
On the same topic:
What do you do when the man next to you is not ready to become a father
When is the right time to become a dad
When one of the partners wants a child, but the other does not
How your life changes when you become a father
Fear of becoming a dad
When he doesn't want children
Tags Discussion baby partner Couple relationship Sex for conception Planning a child You are ready to become a dad Couple relationship Marriage Biological men men Become a father